Vegetarian Star

Being the handsome vegan man he is, Moby is going to have his stalkers.

The latest obsessive fan is full of more plastic than Hollywood.

This looks like something you might watch during Spike Feresten’s Comedy For Stoners.

A plastic Barbie doll is obsessed with Moby in Cassidy Loves Moby, now playing on the Sundance Channel.

“Here I am,” she says in one episode. “Alone at the airport, chasing after some rock star. He comes to me in my dreams.”

Um, yeah. Many levels of creepiness.

Cassidy appears in various scenes blabbing about how much she is into the musician and in between her love gushes are clips with Moby interviews, quotes from his blog, and his tunes.

But we really need to know more about this doll’s diet before she tries to score with the “Troubles So Hard,” singer. As a healthy vegan, he’ll probably want someone similar. 

The clip below shows her on an airplane seat with a package of what looks to be junk food goodies next to her, but little else is given on her diet. Those junk goodies could be bacon flavored.

She drinks bottled water, but that may mean she’s just wasteful and not conscious of the mile high piles of waste those unrecycled plastic bottles are creating in landfills.

Watch below and judge for yourself. Moby material? What the heck did plastic chick eat?

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Joeborden from Creative Commons

If you’re up late watching Fox on Saturday night, you’re lucky enough to be entertained by the handsome and funny Spike Feresten on his Talk Show with Spike Feresten.

Feresten has a segment called “Comedy for Stoners,” which features skits so bizarre, most people would think only someone under the influence imagines them (hence why only the stoned should find it comical, in Spike’s theory).

Recently, Spike aired a Comedy for Stoners which made fun of Joaquin Phoenix’s new rap career.

Joaquin is rapping in an apartment, when part of his “rhyme” is “turn up the radiator,” which he does and results in his electrocution. While Joaquin is passed out, he goes into a fantasy world where he has a conversation with a hamburger and almost eats it.

Yes, Spike has the vegan Joaquin Phoenix wanting to eat a hamburger! And there’s no Boca box nearby.

The hamburger convinces Joaquin not to eat him, but to eat his own beard instead, which Joaquin thinks is cotton candy due to his hallucinations.

My goodness, are you still reading this? Because even if you aren’t stoned, the weirdness itself is probably making you hallucinate.

In the end, because he came so close to eating the hamburger, Joaquin wakes from the dream deciding his next career move is to dress scantily while playing the cello and giving away hamburgers on the street.

And that’s Spike’s comical spin on how Joaquin similarly decided to go into rap. Fans of Phoenix know this is ridiculous.

The real Joaquin would have soy burger sign at his stand.

You can watch the episode which contains the Joaquin Phoenix Comedy for Stoners clip around minute 37 at Fox.com.

Possibly Related Posts:

• The Passing Of A Vegan Prince
• Meatless Mouthful–Stevie Wonder Says Vegan Helps His Good Looks And Planet
• Meatless Monday Recipe–Waka Flocka Blueberry Vegan Muffins (Video)
• Best Vegetarian Stories Of 2015
• Moby Opens Little Pine Vegan Restaurant